We all make mistakes, all humans do. However, to a child's mind, a parent is a role model that they should obey and follow. When we are young, whatever our parents say stick to our innocent minds. That is why when we become parents, we should be wary of the things we tell our children, as it will mold them to what they will become.
Admit it, sometimes our patience with our children are so thin that small mistakes by them and we readily get angry. We often deal with them without thinking the consequence that we are imparting them. As we have reiterated, all of us do make mistakes, even us parents. So we have created a list of phrases that we should not use when talking to our children.
NEVER TELL YOUR KIDS THESE PHRASES TO YOUR CHILDREN:
1. You Are Worthless
The first on the list and probably the worst thing you can say to your children. Most especially when your children look up to you as their role model. How would you feel if your boss or someone higher than you that you admire most tells you that you are worthless? Your children will have a journey in life always looking for self worth and approval from others rather than being true to themselves knowing that by themselves they are worth more.
You can try using these following words of encouragement instead: "You can do better next time, nobody is perfect and can do all things right the first time",
2. Stop Crying Right Now!
Most children are emotional, they would cry when they know they did something wrong. Or when they know that their parents will get angry with them. So telling them to stop crying is teaching them to suppress their emotions and sometimes lie to you, rather than admitting that they committed a mistake.
Let them cry but tell them that what they did was wrong and should never be repeated again. Make sure to tell them that it is better to admit a mistake than hiding it from you.
3. I Am Disappointed In You.
Most of us parents tell our children that we are disappointed with them when they already feel bad about themselves, when they have done something wrong or they didn't achieve what you expect from them. We should not make our children responsible for our disappointment, most especially when our children are already disappointed with themselves.
What we need to give them are words of encouragement and the strength to overcome whatever they want to achieve. We need to be their anchor of strength when they are down or at their lowest.
4. You Are Not (Something) Enough
The fourth words that we normally say to our children that we should not. This are very strong words that makes our children's mindset to be discouraged. By telling this, we are setting their mind that they cannot do anything better for themselves, that they are limited. That they cannot achieve something that they want to be. Even if they have some deficiencies, we should not be telling them that they cannot do certain things.
We should always encourage our children to try new things and explore their capabilities. We should always be there to support them most especially during their trying times.
5. Big Boys/Girls Don't Get Scared
By telling these words to your children, thinking that you are encouraging them to overcome fear, you are mistaken. We should tell our children that it is ok to be afraid but do not let it hinder what you want they want to do. Instead tell them to use that fear to be more careful and aware of the things that might go wrong. Real courage is facing your fear even against all odds and you are terrified and not being fearless.
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Reference: www.healthylifeidea.com
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